Moments Worth Living For

I felt the urge to write this post after reading the post of one of my friends. She had one of those "blah" days that all mothers have. I just think it comes with the territory. You know the days...when the house is a wreck (even though you've already picked up toys 3 or 4 times that day), you don't want to even think about preparing another meal, your two-year-old has had a number of tantrums (resulting in a number of time-outs), and a night by yourself taking care of the kids while your husband is off at school or serving in his calling.

I had a day like that a few days ago and I was so down that I actually emailed my mom and wished that I could go back in time and just have one day where I was single--unattached with no kids. Now, don't get me wrong. I am totally in love with my husband and I absolutely adore my kids. It was more a wistful desire to go back and just have one day where I had no responsibilities to anyone but myself. You know, where you could just cuddle up in bed with a good book, or watch a movie from beginning to end without any interruptions, or just have a bowl of cereal for dinner and not worry about it. I blame my feelings that day largely on the fact that Jonathan had slept really poorly and I had maybe only had about 3 or 4 hours of sleep that night (though I don't know how much sleep I got exactly because I was so out of it that I completely lost track of time).

But as I was reading my friend's post, I was reminded of a quote by Elder M. Russell Ballard from conference in April of 2008. If you would like to read the whole talk, you can find it here. This quote particularly stood out for me:

"We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult. Through my own four-generation experience in our family, and through discussions with mothers of young children throughout the Church, I know something of a mother’s emotions that accompany her commitment to be at home with young children. There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives...The first question: What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more? First, recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction."

As I reflected on the thought that the joy of motherhood comes in moments, I started to think about what moments brought me the most joy recently.

Here are some...

• I don't think anything can compare to having your baby coo, smile, and turn his head towards you when he hears your voice and recognizes you above everyone else.
• Jonathan's smiles are so sweet and his coo is so loveable. I call him my "sweet talker."
• We went to my Mom's house for dinner last night. Peter went outside with my Mom and came in fairly bursting at the seams because he picked some flowers for me. I love flowers. He was so proud/sheepish/shy/exuberant when he saw how happy it made me. I gushed and said thank you to him so many times. He did a little "hide a smile" (where he tries not to smile, but does anyway--even though he tries to hide it). It just made me think about how much I loved to pick flowers for my Mom when I was little. I still love to pick flowers. In fact, it makes me tear up to think about the look on his face when he handed me that pink hyacinth.
• Peter opened a plastic container that had some of his toys in it. He started throwing the toys over his back. Some of them were getting dangerously close to Jonathan. I told Peter to be careful because we didn't want Jonathan to get hurt. He immediately stopped...looked at where the toys were landing...rotated about 180 degrees (so that Jonathan was out of harm's way)...and continued throwing toys over his back. The room was getting messier by the minute, but at least he was protecting his little brother! It made me smile.
• When Jonathan is settling down for a nap, he will rub his face against yours and he usually has a cold little nose. I love the feeling of that cold little nose nuzzling against my face right before he falls asleep!
• Honestly, is there anything better than taking a nap with a baby snuggled against your chest?
• One of my favorite places to kiss on a baby is the bridge of the nose...where the nose meets the forehead. So sweet.
• Catching your husband cuddled up next to your baby boy after he gave you a sanity break so you could have some time to yourself for a bit.
• 
• At my Mom's house last night, Peter discovered a pirate treasure chest that my Mom had bought years ago (in the days when she wondered if she would ever actually have grandchildren at all). Inside were all sorts of pirate goodies...including some make-up to draw pirate mustaches and stubble with. So, I drew the most adorable little mustache on Peter's face. He looked so darn cute! He thought it was so cool that he then proceeded to draw "mustaches" on me, my Mom, and his grandpa! What a mess! But so much fun!
• 
• Peter thinks I am hilarious...I mean, riotous laughing hilarious. Not many people think that about me. :) Jonathan was napping this morning and I put Peter in the bathtub (to wash off the remnants of his pirate mustache) and I made some silly faces at him and he just cracked up and said "ayen" (again) each time I was done. He laughed just as hard each time!
• Peter loves stickers, as you can see from the picture below.
  

I could come up with more. That is just from brainstorming over the past few days. When I was about 7 or 8 months pregnant, we took Peter swimming and then went out to dinner after. I think we went to Bajio (somewhere family friendly like that, at least). While we were sitting there at dinner, I looked around me and saw a large group of guys having a boys' night out. Then, I looked across from me and saw my sweet husband sharing tortilla chips and guacamole with my sweet Pete. I had one of those moments where my heart swelled inside of me and I thought "life just doesn't get any better than this."

And do you know what? Those moments totally overshadow the spills that need to be cleaned up, the tantrums, the exhaustion, etc. I just have to remind myself of these moments. They give me the renewal, strength, and joy needed to help me do my best as a mom. I love being a mom and I sure love my boys!

Oh, and P.S. now that it is past midnight, I have to say happy birthday to my Mom. The most wonderful mother that I could ever hope for...she loved (and continues to love) being a mom and she taught me what being a mother was all about.