Thursday, May 19, 2011

Expectations...


Now, why is it that we set ourselves up to expect certain things under certain circumstances? Besides, isn't it only when we have expectations that we get disappointed?

Today (well, now technically yesterday, since it is past midnight) is my birthday. I turned 32. Isn't that wild? It sounds so much older than I feel.

My only expectation for the day was to make sure I actually did my hair and make-up (quite a feat when I have a two-year-old and a three month old) and to have a nice, relaxing evening with my family. I didn't think those expectations were too high...but I guess they were!

Is that what I got? Not really. EVERYONE was in such a cranky mood...which, of course, put me in a cranky mood.

At least my hair and make-up got done! So, except for the fact that I still need to lose 15 pounds of baby weight, at least I looked kind of cute on my birthday even if nothing else went right!

Now, to off-set the cranky venting above, I'm going to post pictures of my sweet boys. Because even though they can be a lot of work, I would say that they have definitely exceeded my expectations. In a good way, of course!

And as for Peter's addition to the drama of the day, I partly have myself to blame. He definitely inherited my flair for the dramatic. I remember one time when I was little that I wasn't sick, but I wanted attention for some reason. I think I wanted to stay up later and watch more TV. So, I coughed and coughed as loud as I could (even though I didn't have a cough or a sore throat) in order to garner the attention and sympathy of my mother. She didn't come (probably because she was quite accustomed to my shenanigans). The only result? I actually got a cough and a sore throat. That little story explains a lot about Peter's personality...and where he got it from.

Above: My sweet talking, blue-eyed baby boy, Jonathan. Thank goodness for baby carriers when you have a fourteen pound three month old!

Above: Pete and Dad just hangin' out and looking at airplanes flying in the sky.

Above: Look at those sweet cheeks (this was not taken on my birthday...it was taken on another rare day where I did my hair and make-up!).

Above: This picture has nothing to do with me or my boys. This is just a house close by to where we live. It just makes me happy. I've always thought it was pretty. It looks like it should be in England with its pretty ivy and flowers.

Above: Pretending to eat food at Nammy's house. Peter rarely actually eats dinner when we go to Nammy's. There's just too much to do. But, since he's a healthy 32 pounds, I'm not going to stress over it.

Above: Pete still loves playing outside with his Dad.

Above: Rain or shine, Pete craves the great outdoors.

Above: Cute smiles (but tell me, why do grocery stores dye frosting in such awful and stainable neon colors? Can't they make white cupcakes or keep them in pastel shades? Especially when they stock the cupcakes next to the fruits and vegetables that you have to get--not a section of the grocery store you can just skip?). But don't you just love Peter's big brown eyes?

Above: My sweet talkin' Guy Smiley. What a cutie!

Above: Pete playing with Mimi's barn. He loves that barn! It's currently on loan to us. It will be returned once Pete gets sick of it!

Above: Pete loves animals!

Above: Pete loves playing with stickers.

Above: All smiles!

Above: Finally, a day warm enough to actually go outside and play. We had to take advantage of this quickly because it worked with Jonathan being awake and it being warm enough. There was no time to lose...hence the explanation for going outside to play while Peter was still in his pajamas. Seriously, there was no time to get him dressed...it would have wasted precious play time.

Above: Peter loves Mimi and Papa's trampoline.


Above: Just passin' by.


Above: The dreaded tummy time. Jonathan usually only allows tummy time for a maximum of ten minutes. Then he has had enough and he voices his opinions until I roll him over to his back.


Above: Jonathan sure is cute while tummy time lasts though!



Above: As soon as we get inside, Peter insists on removing his clothes! Jonathan is only in his diaper because he just spit up on his pajamas.

Above: Peter loves the mountains. We went last Friday and Peter had a blast throwing rocks into the river and hiking with his Dad. I couldn't keep up with them since it was pretty steep and I had Jonathan in the baby carrier. Plus, we hadn't really planned on hiking and I was only wearing flip flops.

Above: I was soon left far behind!


Above: Peter was excited to see the moon in the daytime.

Above: The river that benefited from so many rocks thrown into it by Peter (though none of the rocks Peter threw in are actually visible...those boulders didn't come from Pete).


Above: Jonathan being held up by Daddy. Jonathan is in shock at Daddy's blatant mistreatment of his fashionable onesie.


Above: Cute baby chubs!


Above: How can someone so young already know where his loyalties lie? He must know where Mommy got her bachelor's degree from.

Above: Macho, macho man! Seriously, I can rarely get this guy to wear clothes at home. But dangerously tromping around in Daddy's ski boots? That's another thing entirely. At least he doesn't have a problem wearing clothes in public. Pick your battles and count your blessings, eh?


Above: Don't let the smile deceive you. Jonathan has absolutely no idea what in the world to do with this exersaucer. He's simply smiling because he's so sweet. I was pretty sure that he would be too little for the exersaucer (I think he will be up for it in about a month or two at the most). But I got impatient and wanted to try it out. I had to stuff the seat with his blankets to keep him propped up and then, of course, he couldn't have reached any of the toys--even if he had tried or wanted to. But he's my sweet smiley guy, so he smiled just the same.

Above: Ahhh. Now this is the kind of play time that makes sense to me right now!

Above: Jonathan isn't naked (though it looks like I strategically used his blanket to cover his nether-regions. He's wearing a diaper...but as is the case with all of his diaper-only pictures, he spit up on his outfit and he just looked so darned cute in his skivvies that I couldn't resist taking a picture or two).


Above: Peter is finally loving his little brother (this magical change took place right around the time Jonathan turned two months old). In fact, while I was talking to my sister on the phone, Peter snuck in a couple of sweet kisses--right on the mouth. So sweet. But it looks like Jonathan is going to catch Peter's cold now! Maybe there was no way around it. Peter just caught this cold and he has been sneezing like crazy...and every time he sneezes, I swear his sneezes create a two-mile radius of germ infestations!


Above: What a rascal!


Above: Oh nooooo!


Above: Jonathan sweetly enduring Daddy's kisses.


Above: What a day! Time for some sleep. That definitely applies to me. I stayed up way too late, but after the day I had today, I definitely needed to blow off some steam and do something to cheer myself up. And even though my boys tucker me out, looking at sweet pictures of them and reflecting on the good times always helps me to feel better.

Hopefully I'm not dead on my feet tomorrow...I think I'm starting to feel Peter's cold coming on...uh oh!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Hooray for...

The fact that I'm not pregnant! That's right. TMI you say? I don't care. I'm so relieved! I forgot to take my birth control two days in a row this past month. I was so worried that I was pregnant again. I need a little more than two months off from being pregnant, you know?

Now, it wouldn't have been the end of the world if I was pregnant because we are planning on having more kids. But I would like them spaced a little further apart. 11 months apart wouldn't have been enough!

Besides, our goal has always been to have the hospital bills paid off from the previous baby before we have another. My personal goal is to have lost the baby weight before I get pregnant again. I did it with Peter, but I still have 15 pounds to lose from my baby weight with Jonathan. Besides, I am not physically, emotionally, financially, or spiritually prepared to welcome another baby yet!

Whew! What a relief!

Thanks for letting me share! Oh, and I have now set a daily reminder on my phone to remind me to take my birth control pills!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Blessing Day


Above: My sweet little Jonathan.


On Sunday, May 1st, we blessed Jonathan Jeremiah Washburn.

Church starts for us at 9 a.m., so we all had to get up bright and early to get there on time. Sunday was the first time that all of us have gone to church together since before Jonathan was born. Peter was sick two weeks before Jonathan was born and I kept him home after he broke his leg because he only had a splint and couldn't walk on it. Then, of course, Jonathan was born. I kept both Peter and Jonathan home with me during RSV season. Because I tell you, if there is a cold, flu, or other sickness to be caught, Peter will catch it--even if he was only exposed to the germs/viruses for ten minutes (or less).

It was kind of crazy getting everyone ready--and getting up myself! Jonathan is still waking up to eat 2-3 times a night and I'm not getting a ton of sleep as a result. So, these days, I mostly lounge around in my pajamas because no way am I getting up early to get ready when I could be sleeping instead! I am doing my best to use the boys' afternoon nap time to exercise (when they cooperate and actually nap at the same time). So, on the days I do get ready, it doesn't happen until 3 p.m.!

Above: Jonathan looking sweet and content...as he does every morning!

It was so nice to get out with our entire family though. It was a beautiful, warm spring day. Both Peter and Jonathan were in good moods. We got Peter fed and then we got everyone dressed.

Jonathan looked so cute in the blessing outfit that his Nammy made for him.

Above: Jonathan in the blessing outfit his Nammy made for him. I couldn't get him to smile though because he was cranky that I had squished his feet into shoes that were too small for him. Here he is right after I took the shoes off of him. I'll have to put the blessing outfit on him again and take more pictures when I have time. It's too hard to get a glamour shot when you're trying to get to 9 a.m. church on time! I took nearly ten pictures and none of them were great.

And Peter looked so grown up and handsome in his church clothes. He was so proud of the way he looked that he snuck up behind me, tugged on my dress to show off his outfit, and then looked very shy as I admired it.

Above: Peter in his church clothes. Though he was being sassy and wouldn't let me get a decent picture.

It was so nice to have our family there to participate. It meant so much to us.

Jeremiah blessed Jonathan to take after his namesakes in the Bible. Jonathan is named after one of the best examples of being a friend in the Bible--Jonathan, King David's friend. He is also named after his Dad, and the prophet Jeremiah. One of the most well known scriptures in the book of Jeremiah is about missionary work. It is Jeremiah 16:16 "Behold, I will send for many fishers, saith the Lord, and they shall fish them; and after will I send for many hunters, and they shall hunt them from every mountain, and from every hill, and out of the holes of the rocks."

Jonathan was blessed by his Dad to be a good friend to all those around him--especially his big brother Peter. He was also blessed with a desire to be a missionary and to share the gospel. Finally, he was blessed to turn to his family as a support group to help him throughout his life. It was a very special blessing.

Peter and Nammy missed it because Peter lead her out of the chapel as soon as the opening song was finished. He did come back into the chapel for a few very well-timed moments of drama.

I bore my testimony on the importance of names. I am grateful for what I have learned about the Savior and the ability to come to know His personality through the names He has been given. For instance, I love that one of His names is Alpha and Omega--which means "the beginning and the end." I know that the Savior is the beginning of all things good (love, repentance, happiness, families, forgiveness, etc.) and the ending of all things bad (unhappiness, hate, sorrow, fear, etc.). That name, alone, teaches so much about what kind of a person Jesus is. And Jesus has MANY names. So much to learn from all of His names!

I am grateful that I have been able to grow and take on different responsibilities with the different names I have taken upon myself. As Sarah Mackay, I gained the capacities and talents to carry the responsibility of being Sarah Mackay. When I became Sarah Washburn and Wife, I grew in my capacity and took on new responsibilities and grew. When I took upon me the name of Mother by becoming the mother of Peter, I grew again and learned as my capacity further expanded. As I have become the mother of two sons by becoming the mother of Jonathan, I have felt my capacity growing even more. I was terrified of becoming a mother of two boys--especially since Peter is quite a handful. He is the most adorable, loving, rambunctious little guy. But just as HIS namesake Simon Peter, he is just as passionate. My Passionate Peter. I was so scared of how I would juggle the two of them and give them both the care that they needed. I really didn't think I could do it. I had many pregnancy hormone induced breakdowns regarding that fear.

But again, my capacity has grown. The Lord saw in me much more than I saw in myself and He has given me the ability to tackle the tasks that have been placed before me.

As I bore my testimony, my sweet passionate Peter heard me in his wanderings around the ward house and ran all the way up the aisle to me (calling "Mama! Mama!" the whole way). While everyone in the whole ward shifted their gaze from me to Pete. I closed my testimony and picked up my sweet guy who was doing his chin quiver. A little dramatic trick he picked up on his own.

Oh, and during the closing hymn, Peter (who had gone back out into the halls with his Nammy), somehow got away from Nammy and ran back up to the podium (I think he thought he would find me there again since that's where he found me last time). I had to be the one to chase him up the aisle. Oh, and I was wearing a new pair of high-heeled shoes which I discovered the hard way will only be used for fancy dates because I can't walk fast enough in them to run after Peter. When I got him, he screamed for his Nammy at the top of his lungs. I had to take him out of the chapel and into an empty classroom to (unsuccessfully) muffle his screams. For those of you who haven't heard Peter yell, he is pretty darn loud. I told a few ladies later that I get my attention through my kids and that I just wanted to make a dramatic re-entry into church-going.

By the way, as a side note, thank you to all those people out there who understand what it is like to have a strong-willed child. I was so appreciative of the sympathetic or amused expressions from the majority of the congregation...as opposed to the few looks of disapproval I got. I am grateful that most of the people in my ward realize that Peter being so passionate is not a result of me coddling, overindulging, or spoiling him...but a result of his nature. He was born with that. I'm doing my best to teach him! I really am! Contrary to what some people may believe, I don't let him have his way in everything. He does get told "no."

I told Jeremiah that I'll have to study up on ways to discipline him in public because time-outs are proving really successful at home, but what do you do when you're not at home? Oh, and for any of you moms out there who have dealt with rowdy kids in sacrament meeting, I would love any and all tips that you have for keeping your kids in their seats and quiet!

Needless to say, it was a very busy morning. Because Peter has been mostly house-bound with me and Jonathan, it was the most action he had seen in the morning in a long time. That's why I can understand why Peter fell asleep on the drive home. Though Jeremiah and I were pretty surprised. It has been at least 6 months since Peter has fallen asleep in the car!


Yes, I do believe my capacity has grown and will continue to grow...indeed!

Above: Bonus picture of my three boys sitting in a fort/pirate ship that I made out of the little couch. It looks like Pete has my childhood habit of smiling in an overzealous manner for the camera!


Above: Bonus picture of my hero. Electrical Tape Man! Seriously, I can't get Peter to wear clothes at home! At least he doesn't object to wearing clothes in public. I guess you have to pick your battles, right? We got creative with some electrical tape (he thinks it's so funny when you put tape or stickers on him). He thought he looked so cool! And he does!


Above: Casual breakfast at the Washburn residence. Dig Jonathan's double chin!


Above: A parting view of my sweet sweet Jonathan.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Ahhhhhh Nuts!

Well, it's official, Peter is dangerously allergic to tree nuts. Sigh. You know what? Something I never foresaw about being a parent is how stressful it is to be the steward over your children. It's a huge responsibility! And sometimes it is very, very scary.

I promised to share the adventures of the first month after Jonathan joined us. It just felt like whatever could go wrong...did. Now, I don't want this to be a downer post. In many ways, looking back on it, it all seems downright laughable how many things went wrong that first month!

Well, let's see...

I've already told about how Peter broke his leg a week before my due date to deliver Jonathan and how I went into labor on my exact due date...and of course, that happened to be the day we were scheduled to put Peter's cast on him. I was having some pretty strong contractions while I was holding Peter down as his cast was being put on him. I drove him home, got him lunch (in the midst of some crazy strong contractions), called Jeremiah and my mom, and headed off to the hospital once they both arrived.

Now, for the story of the aftermath that followed the hospital...

Jonathan was born on February 23rd and I remained in the hospital until February 25th (I had to stay a minimum of two days because I tested positive for Strep B--as I had with Peter's pregnancy too).

As it happened, Jeremiah got a pretty bad kidney stone the very evening of the day that I delivered Jonathan. Jeremiah didn't want me to worry about it, so he didn't tell me until the following evening. By that time, the kidney stone still hadn't passed. Jeremiah has quite the history of kidney stones...so he still had some painkillers from the last kidney stone. However, it was so bad that he checked himself into the emergency room the day I was scheduled to check out of the hospital. I actually had to wait for Jeremiah before Jonathan and I could check out (and for the record, Jeremiah's kidney stone/emergency room visit ended up costing more than my delivery/anesthesia! In addition to Peter's broken leg costs, and Jonathan's portion of the medical bill, we've had a lot of fun medical payments/bills lately! Whoohoo!).

The last day at the hospital, they informed me that Jonathan's weight was great and he didn't have jaundice (two problems that Peter had that prompted extra doctor's visits) so I wouldn't have to go to the doctor until the two week visit. With Peter, I had to go back to the doctor the first two or three days that I was home as a new mom. That was pretty stressful and overwhelming to me (especially since I was struggling with breastfeeding and it was a pretty daunting task to get Peter fed, dressed, and out of the house to get to the doctor on time when he was eating every two hours). I was so relieved that I wouldn't have to make those doctor's visits with Jonathan.

We arrived home to welcome Jonathan and get Peter accustomed to having a new family member and seriously within about ten minutes of our arrival, Peter sneezed and I had to wipe a runny nose. I turned to my Mom with concern in my eyes and said "What was that?" She, equally concerned, said "I don't know...that's the first time it happened!" That's right. If there is any kind of cold or flu to be caught, Peter will somehow catch it. I know exactly where he caught it from too (because he hadn't been anywhere else or around anyone else for about two weeks). He caught it from the waiting room at the doctor's office where he got the cast put on him. I was too concerned with being in labor to keep him away from certain germ-infested toys in the waiting room at the time.

I hoped and I prayed that Peter wouldn't pass that cold/flu on to Jonathan (I'm still not sure what it was...Peter was feverish--which would indicate a flu, but other than that, all of the symptoms pointed to a really bad cold). However, no such luck. About five days after Peter showed his first symptoms, Jonathan showed his. At that point, he was only one week old. And I don't know about you, but it is scary to have a newborn get sick. Especially since it can mean that your baby might have to go back to the hospital. Peter had it bad...so I wasn't surprised when Jonathan got it bad too. Jeremiah was still not back to feeling himself after his kidney stone. Plus, Jeremiah and I both caught the cold too (though I got the most mild version of it and I was basically only inconvenienced--but everyone else got it pretty bad). Pretty miserable stuff. I was super worried that it was RSV because Primary Children's is like the den of RSV during this time of year. But, luckily, it wasn't.

One thing I was really surprised about was how awesome I felt--even the very next day after delivering. Not only did I feel great physically (it never even felt like I'd had a baby), but I felt great emotionally too. I'm so grateful...it was definitely a tender mercy...because I needed that extra energy taking care of my three little sickies. I called them "My Three Sons" even though technically one of them was my husband and not my son. Have you ever seen the "man cold" commercial? If you have, you know what I'm talking about when I refer to "my three sons." If you haven't seen the man cold commercial, click here. It is a universal truth that if a whole family is sick, everyone can stay in bed and be served, except the mother, who must continue to serve others--even if she is as sick (or sicker) than those she is serving. I think it just comes with the territory of being a mom. From the moment I returned home from the hospital, I was on my feet taking care of my family.

I did have a few small breakdowns (understandably so) when I realized that I would need to make extra visits to the doctor due to Jonathan's cold and the fact that his appetite seemed to have decreased since he came home from the hospital. I had a home scale and he hadn't gained the way he should have and he was eating less than he had while we were in the hospital (it later turned out that Jonathan just didn't like the kind of bottle we were giving him...once we changed the bottle, he started to eat much more again). After visiting the doctor, he advised me to monitor Jonathan very closely. I had to feed him every two hours (day and night) and keep a log of his wet and poopy diapers, his milk intake (amount in ml and ounces), weigh him once a day, and take his temperature multiple times throughout the day. All while taking care of Peter and Jeremiah (who was still in a great deal of pain from the kidney stone, in addition to having caught that blasted cold). As I mentioned, it's scary to have a sick newborn. If they have a temperature of 100.4 degrees or higher, it is an automatic trip to the emergency room and most likely a stay in the hospital for the baby. Jonathan was a little feverish and even got as high as 100.1 degrees at one point...but his fever broke very soon after and he never reached 100.4 degrees. It was pretty stressful!

To compound matters, my Mom (who was planning to help me out during this time) caught a cold too and didn't want to get the boys even sicker. So, she didn't come over as much as she initially planned. But as I said, the Lord blessed me and I had the strength necessary to take care of my guys. My Mom (bless her heart) helped me a great deal in spite of being sick (by doing all of my laundry--geez, you have to do a lot of laundry with new babies...they spit up at least 2-4 seconds after you put a new outfit on them). She also babysat Pete for me while I took Jonathan to the doctor.

In addition to those doctor's appointments, there was the appointment to get Peter's cast taken off when Jonathan was three weeks old.

Then, there was the two week doctor's appointment for Jonathan as well as an appointment with a urologist at Primary Children's to check out an issue with Jonathan's circumcision (that appointment was only a day before Pete was scheduled to get his cast removed). Blah! Jeremiah, bless his heart, took Peter to get his cast taken off because after the appointment about Jonathan's circumcision (where basically the doctor told me to just "wait and see" meaning that it was completely pointless for me to have gone to that appointment at all, I would just have to watch to see if the condition cleared up, and there was a good chance that I would have to make another trip to the urology office at Primary Children's to get it fixed in the near future anyway), I told Jeremiah that I was going to have a breakdown if I had to go to Primary Children's or St. Mark's one more time before Jonathan's two month appointment.

Did I speak too soon? I think so.

Because when Jonathan was about a month old, on a nice, fun, relaxing Sunday, Peter had a terrible allergic reaction to some cashews he ate while visiting his Papa upstairs with Jeremiah. Peter had one cashew and thought it was pretty tasty and then he filled his whole mouth with cashews. But then he freaked out and spit them out. He wouldn't calm down, so Jeremiah brought him down to me. I washed his mouth out and cuddled him only to realize that he had a poopy diaper. While I was changing him, I noticed that his chest and neck were flushed and that he was itching like crazy and developing hives. I told Jeremiah who came to see and we both realized that Peter was having an allergic reaction. Jeremiah rushed off to Shopko where he talked to the pharmacists there (he knows them pretty well) to ask for some advice. They advised him to get children's Benedryl and a few other allergy medications. Jeremiah returned home with the medicine and we gave it to Peter. He seemed to calm down a little and I put him in the tub to relax him.

However, while Peter was in the tub, it didn't look like he was getting better to me. In fact, I thought he looked like he was getting a little worse. His eyes looked puffy and his lips looked swollen to me. I asked Jeremiah to look at him and see if he had improved. Jeremiah and I decided that he didn't look much better. Jeremiah took Peter upstairs to ask his mom for advice and I called the doctor on call at our pediatrician's office to see what they thought. On the advice of the doctor on call (who luckily turned out to be our pediatrician), Jeremiah took Peter to an instacare office nearby. By that time, Peter's hives were covering his back, but his breathing had improved. It turned out that the Benedryl had finally kicked in (oh, and by the way, Benedryl doesn't knock Peter out...it does the opposite and makes him really energetic and hyper). They gave us a prescription for an epi pen and told us to set up an appointment with an allergist. Sigh.

So, we finally had the appointment with the allergist today. We'll have to meet with her again in a year to get more final results, but at this point in time, we need to consider Peter being allergic to all tree nuts--and especially cashews and pistachios. She also gave us a prescription for an epi pen and gave some further instructions and warnings. Peter's allergy (at least to cashews and pistachios) is so severe that it could be fatal if it isn't cared for properly. Also, we will need to get Jonathan checked when he is about a year old because it is pretty common for siblings to have similar allergies. Scary stuff. For now, I have to avoid all tree nuts (cashews, pistachios, pecans, almonds, walnuts, hazelnuts, macadamia nuts, pine nuts, etc.). In a year, we might find that some of those allergies are less severe and not much to worry about. However, the doctor seemed pretty positive that cashews and pistachios would always be a problem. Though you never know what might happen with medical advancements. They may come up with a pill or a shot that would allow Peter to tolerate them and remove him from any danger they might pose.

So, again, thank goodness for the day and age that we live in and for the medical advancements and technology that we have at our fingertips. But I'm going to have to study up and be really educated about this so that I can protect my sweet Pete.

As I said before, it's a scary thing to be the steward over another human being. I'm going to have to be careful and watchful over my sweet little guy.

But I learned something else...I learned that a person's capacity grows when it is tested. My capacity really has expanded. I think it has to. But I have seen quite a change in myself in becoming the mother of two sons. As a mother of one son (who is VERY busy), I honestly didn't know how I would be able to accomplish certain tasks or responsibilities. But I have been blessed to do so. I'm not exactly sure how it happened...it just did. I've been able to accomplish and overcome. And I have been faced with a lot more during the past two months than I thought I would have to deal with...that's for sure!

Oh, and sorry Laurie and Emily--Peter is also quite allergic to cats and dogs.

Oh, and here's something interesting: Peter isn't allergic to peanuts (they are a legume, not a tree nut). But I have to give him peanuts in some form at least 3 or 4 times a week, otherwise he could develop an allergy to them. Who would have thought? The human body is a complex thing, that's for sure!

As for pollen and other animals, the doctor felt that it would be best to wait until next year's appointment to test for them at that time. Peter is still too little and things can still change. At that point, it might only be cashews and pistachios that are a concern and other tree nuts might be okay then. We'll just have to wait and see.

But seriously, can you believe the couple of months I have had? Can anything else go wrong? Of course it can, so I'd better shut up and not say anything else, or something WILL go wrong! That's just the luck I've had lately! Oh, and this blog hasn't even touched on the whole situation we had with getting Peter used to having a new baby brother. Talk about jealousy! And anger! Dangerous situations for both me and Jonathan with dodging objects thrown by Peter and other such similar adventures! Jonathan is barely two months old and Peter has finally gotten used to him (he even sometimes likes him!).

There was a BYU devotional entitled "The Spiritual Gems of Life" by Jordan J. Cox. In that talk, he gave an analogy of how bridges are built. He taught that bridges are built to withstand the elements that they are placed in. Wind speed, weight placed on the bridge, weather, etc. are all taken into account before a bridge is built. He compared us to bridges. He stated that the Lord has fashioned us knowing full well what kinds of conditions we would be placed in...and that the Lord built us to succeed. I know this is true. I know that the Lord knew every situation I would be placed in and that He gave me the skills, talents, knowledge, resources, people around me, and the ability to learn and grow more in order to survive to storms and stresses of my life.

Many adventures lie ahead, let me tell you! It's a good thing I am up to the challenge.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Friday, April 22, 2011

Those Hard to Capture Smiles


I have been on a quest the past month to try and capture via picture or video Jonathan's sweet smiles. It is not an easy task to capture a newborn's smiles.

As soon as a camera's flash goes off, the smile is gone...and if you don't use a flash, the picture is blurry. And somehow, every child (baby or older) seems to lose focus when a camera or video camera is brought out.

Jonathan was super smiley this morning. As soon as I came back with Peter's breakfast, I looked down at Jonathan and he was beaming at me. He just looked overjoyed and tickled pink to see me. I rushed for my camera and got some sweet videos and pictures. His really big smiles were past by the time I got the camera, but he shared some of his sweet, content smiles with me. I hope you enjoy them too!

Oh, and in my defense, in the video, there is a blanket on one of the couches (that makes things look rather messy and trashy). That is because Peter likes to play "night, night" and I am constantly making up "beds" for him to go night night in. That particular bed was leftover from the night before.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Moments Worth Living For


I felt the urge to write this post after reading the post of one of my friends. She had one of those "blah" days that all mothers have. I just think it comes with the territory. You know the days...when the house is a wreck (even though you've already picked up toys 3 or 4 times that day), you don't want to even think about preparing another meal, your two-year-old has had a number of tantrums (resulting in a number of time-outs), and a night by yourself taking care of the kids while your husband is off at school or serving in his calling.

I had a day like that a few days ago and I was so down that I actually emailed my mom and wished that I could go back in time and just have one day where I was single--unattached with no kids. Now, don't get me wrong. I am totally in love with my husband and I absolutely adore my kids. It was more a wistful desire to go back and just have one day where I had no responsibilities to anyone but myself. You know, where you could just cuddle up in bed with a good book, or watch a movie from beginning to end without any interruptions, or just have a bowl of cereal for dinner and not worry about it. I blame my feelings that day largely on the fact that Jonathan had slept really poorly and I had maybe only had about 3 or 4 hours of sleep that night (though I don't know how much sleep I got exactly because I was so out of it that I completely lost track of time).

But as I was reading my friend's post, I was reminded of a quote by Elder M. Russell Ballard from conference in April of 2008. If you would like to read the whole talk, you can find it here. This quote particularly stood out for me:

"We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult. Through my own four-generation experience in our family, and through discussions with mothers of young children throughout the Church, I know something of a mother’s emotions that accompany her commitment to be at home with young children. There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives...The first question: What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more? First, recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction."

As I reflected on the thought that the joy of motherhood comes in moments, I started to think about what moments brought me the most joy recently.

Here are some...
  • I don't think anything can compare to having your baby coo, smile, and turn his head towards you when he hears your voice and recognizes you above everyone else.
  • Jonathan's smiles are so sweet and his coo is so loveable. I call him my "sweet talker."
  • We went to my Mom's house for dinner last night. Peter went outside with my Mom and came in fairly bursting at the seams because he picked some flowers for me. I love flowers. He was so proud/sheepish/shy/exuberant when he saw how happy it made me. I gushed and said thank you to him so many times. He did a little "hide a smile" (where he tries not to smile, but does anyway--even though he tries to hide it). It just made me think about how much I loved to pick flowers for my Mom when I was little. I still love to pick flowers. In fact, it makes me tear up to think about the look on his face when he handed me that pink hyacinth.
  • Peter opened a plastic container that had some of his toys in it. He started throwing the toys over his back. Some of them were getting dangerously close to Jonathan. I told Peter to be careful because we didn't want Jonathan to get hurt. He immediately stopped...looked at where the toys were landing...rotated about 180 degrees (so that Jonathan was out of harm's way)...and continued throwing toys over his back. The room was getting messier by the minute, but at least he was protecting his little brother! It made me smile.
  • When Jonathan is settling down for a nap, he will rub his face against yours and he usually has a cold little nose. I love the feeling of that cold little nose nuzzling against my face right before he falls asleep!
  • Honestly, is there anything better than taking a nap with a baby snuggled against your chest?
  • One of my favorite places to kiss on a baby is the bridge of the nose...where the nose meets the forehead. So sweet.
  • Catching your husband cuddled up next to your baby boy after he gave you a sanity break so you could have some time to yourself for a bit.
  • At my Mom's house last night, Peter discovered a pirate treasure chest that my Mom had bought years ago (in the days when she wondered if she would ever actually have grandchildren at all). Inside were all sorts of pirate goodies...including some make-up to draw pirate mustaches and stubble with. So, I drew the most adorable little mustache on Peter's face. He looked so darn cute! He thought it was so cool that he then proceeded to draw "mustaches" on me, my Mom, and his grandpa! What a mess! But so much fun!
  • Peter thinks I am hilarious...I mean, riotous laughing hilarious. Not many people think that about me. :) Jonathan was napping this morning and I put Peter in the bathtub (to wash off the remnants of his pirate mustache) and I made some silly faces at him and he just cracked up and said "ayen" (again) each time I was done. He laughed just as hard each time!
  • Peter loves stickers, as you can see from the picture below.
I could come up with more. That is just from brainstorming over the past few days. When I was about 7 or 8 months pregnant, we took Peter swimming and then went out to dinner after. I think we went to Bajio (somewhere family friendly like that, at least). While we were sitting there at dinner, I looked around me and saw a large group of guys having a boys' night out. Then, I looked across from me and saw my sweet husband sharing tortilla chips and guacamole with my sweet Pete. I had one of those moments where my heart swelled inside of me and I thought "life just doesn't get any better than this."

And do you know what? Those moments totally overshadow the spills that need to be cleaned up, the tantrums, the exhaustion, etc. I just have to remind myself of these moments. They give me the renewal, strength, and joy needed to help me do my best as a mom. I love being a mom and I sure love my boys!

Oh, and P.S. now that it is past midnight, I have to say happy birthday to my Mom. The most wonderful mother that I could ever hope for...she loved (and continues to love) being a mom and she taught me what being a mother was all about.